You may have heard it before, calling to you through the walls of your home... You may have smelled it before; a horrid crossbreed of evaporated crotch sweat and combustable controlled substances creeping through your windowframe... You may have even seen it, thrashing and crashing on an elevated hill just past a weathered wooden fence... No matter what grouping of neurons it has stimulated, there is a sense of familiarity to this odd presence...

The dissonant sound of plucked strings searching for a foundation, twanging towards a new horizon...

The rancorous, clipping vibrations of an 808 preset on a BOSS drum machine...

The dulcit tones of a forgotten MIDI keyboard ringing through the suburbs...

The powerful shockwaves of a festering snare, loud brass crashes, thuddy toms, and a bass drum pedal that seems to have a mind of its own...

The occasional high pitched feedback of cheap used recording equipment...

And most disgusting of all, the inscrutably unamerican stench of a couple'a PRETENTIOUS HIPPIE SOCIALIST SISSYBOYS...

There is no easy explanation for this phenomenon. It has eluded top scientists across the globe. Week by week, this affliction only seems to increase in amplitude. Reports of chronic nausea, headaches, nasal irritation, tinnitus, bromidrosis, and fear of the future have increased tenfold and are on track to increase exponentially. Authoritative officials across our fine country remain curiously indifferent. How can this presence be identified? Where does it reside? Does it pose any immediate threat to society at large? There's only one way to find out...

DO NOT FEAR V.C

WELCOME IT INTO YOUR MORTAL COIL AND VIBRATE WITH DELIGHT!

VIDEO EVIDENCE AUDIO EVIDENCE